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All posts must make an attempt at humor. Make a self-post instead. It seems to me, OP tried way too hard for this. She couldn't even get the tassels going in different directions. That's what I thought of before scrolling down in the comments.

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You must have JavaScript enabled in your browser to utilize the functionality of this website. No link shorteners or HugeURL in either post links or comments. Changed due to misleading title. No gore or porn including sexually graphic images.

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